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Give the person a fine reputation to live up to.
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Just friends pdf book how to#
What do you think about this? Do you think that would work? Ask for suggestions on how to improve things, to get them to have a personal stake in their own ideas. Ask questions instead of giving orders.“When I was in your position, I did the same thing.”.Talk about your own related mistakes, suggesting you know how difficult the task can be.When introducing a point of feedback, start by praising other specific things that were done well.This neutralizes the sting of future feedback. Even before you need to give feedback, praise and appreciate the other person constantly without asking for anything.Think of them as people who really want to help you. Anyone who takes time to disagree with you is interested in the same things you are. Thank your opponents sincerely for their interest.They will tend to moderate your position (“oh, I don’t think that’s as much a problem as you say”), and talk themselves out of it. Volunteer the downsides of your approach, and ask how they feel about it.Emphasize how your position serves the other person’s interests and incentives.This will make them feel they independently changed their mind. Start with undeniable areas of agreement, then approach your ultimate point in terms they will agree with.
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